🕯️How to Practice U-Turns in IFS

A U-turn in IFS is the gentle redirection of attention from the outside world back toward your inner system. It’s what happens when you pause blaming, analyzing, or fixing someone else and instead ask, “What part of me is activated right now?”

In moments of conflict, it’s natural for protectors to turn outward — to judge, defend, or withdraw. A U-turn invites you to turn inward, not to scold yourself, but to notice who inside is reacting. Perhaps a hurt exile was touched, or a protector felt threatened.

To practice a U-turn, start by noticing the impulse to focus on the other person. Then breathe and ask, “What’s happening in me right now?” You might sense tension in your chest, heat in your stomach, or a voice saying, “They don’t understand me.” Stay with that part. Let it know you’re here to listen.

A U-turn doesn’t mean ignoring the outer situation or excusing harm. It simply means beginning inside, where clarity lives. When you understand the parts within, you return to the conversation — or to life — with more compassion and less reactivity.

The U-turn is not retreat. It’s return — from projection to presence, from reaction to relationship.

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