Chapter 20 – Tao Te Ching

1. The Verse (Original)

Give up learning, and put an end to your troubles.

Between “yes” and “no,”how much difference is there?

Between “good” and “evil,”how far apart are they?

What others fear,one must also fear.How very confused,how very indistinct I am.

The people are so cheerful,as if at a great feast,as if climbing a tower in spring.

I alone am quiet,not yet having shown myself,like a baby that has not yet smiled.

I alone seem aimless,with no place to return.

The people all have more than enough.I alone seem to have lost everything.

My mind is that of a fool—so dull, so blank.

Ordinary people are bright and clear.I alone am dim and cloudy.

Ordinary people are clever and sharp.I alone am clumsy and slow,drifting like the sea,blowing about, seemingly with no destination.

The people all have their purposes.I alone am stubborn and strange.

I am nourished by the Mother.

2. The Essence — What Laozi Is Actually Saying

This chapter is Laozi speaking in his own voice—raw, honest, almost lonely.

He shows you what it feels liketo live in alignment with the Taoin a world obsessed with cleverness, success, and certainty.

He says:

• “Give up learning” — not real understanding,but the restless accumulation of ideas and opinionsthat only multiplies confusion.

• The difference between “yes” and “no,”“good” and “evil,”is not as clear-cut as most people think.Social morality is often rigid and shallow.

• The sage feels out of step with the crowd:while everyone else seems excited, confident, and purposeful,the sage feels quiet, empty, simple—like a newborn, like the sea, like a wanderer.

But this is not depression.It is depth.

Laozi is showing you:

To see through the illusions of societywill often make you look foolish.

To live from the Taomeans you may not fit the games of status, ambition, and certainty.

Yet beneath this apparent foolishnessis a profound nourishment:

“I am nourished by the Mother.”

The sage lives from a deeper Source—the Tao as the cosmic Mother—and does not need the props of cleverness,opinions, and social approval.

3. Modern Clarity — Slow, Rich, Beginner-Friendly Line-by-Line Commentary

“Give up learning, and put an end to your troubles.”

This is not an attack on wisdom itself.It’s a strike against restless, ego-driven learning—the constant need to gather information,collect viewpoints,argue, define, debate, and be “right.”

That kind of learningdoes not bring peace.It amplifies anxiety.

Laozi is saying:If you stop clinging to mental mastery,you’ll suffer less.

Real understanding is simple,embodied,quiet.

**“Between ‘yes’ and ‘no,’

how much difference is there?”**

He’s questioning rigid duality.

“Yes” and “no” feel absolute,but in real life,things are often mixed, shifting, nuanced.

Our certainty about our judgmentscreates trouble.

The Tao is more fluidthan our sharp categories.

**“Between ‘good’ and ‘evil,’

how far apart are they?”**

Again, Laozi is not denying morality.He’s pointing to how quickly“good” and “evil”can flip depending on perspective, culture, or context.

Humans get fiercely attached to their moral labels,and this attachment leads to conflict.

The sage sees a deeper dimension beneath these labels—not moral relativism,but a recognition that life is more complexthan our favorite judgments.

**“What others fear,

one must also fear.How very confused,how very indistinct I am.”**

He’s noticing:

Most people share the same fears—failure, loss of face, death, rejection.

To function in society,you often end up fearing what everyone fears.

But from the Tao’s perspective,these fears are not ultimate.

So the sage feels “confused” and “indistinct”—not because he lacks clarity,but because he doesn’t buy into the common anxieties.

He doesn’t respond the way everyone else does.

**“The people are so cheerful,

as if at a great feast,as if climbing a tower in spring.”**

The crowd seems joyful, excited, busy:

• celebrating achievements

• chasing pleasures

• climbing social ladders (“tower in spring”)

There is a sense of seasonal excitement—life as a festival of activity and ambition.

**“I alone am quiet,

not yet having shown myself,like a baby that has not yet smiled.”**

While the crowd is animated,Laozi feels inwardly still.

He compares himself to a newborn:

• not yet performing

• not yet playing social roles

• simply being

The sage lives in a kind of pre-social innocence—not naive,but unperformed.

**“I alone seem aimless,

with no place to return.”**

He appears directionlessbecause he’s not chasing the usual goals.

“No place to return”doesn’t mean homelessness in a tragic sense—it means he doesn’t belongto any fixed identity or agenda.

He lives in the freedomof not being pinned down.

To the crowd, that looks like being lost.To the Tao, that is being free.

**“The people all have more than enough.

I alone seem to have lost everything.”**

Others are full—of plans, possessions, opinions, roles.

He feels “empty,”having let many of these go.

But this emptiness is not poverty—it is openness.

He’s pointing to the paradox:To the world,letting go looks like losing.To the Tao,letting go is gaining spaciousness.

**“My mind is that of a fool—

so dull, so blank.”**

He is not actually a fool.This is how he appearsto those who value constant mental busy-ness.

His mind is quiet, unagitated, simple.

To the world’s standards,that looks like stupidity.To the Tao,it is clarity.

**“Ordinary people are bright and clear.

I alone am dim and cloudy.”**

Ordinary minds are full of quick conclusions,firm opinions,sharp judgments.

They feel “bright” because they are busy.

The sage is “dim and cloudy”because he does not rush to define things.

He lets life stay a little mysterious.He allows ambiguity.He doesn’t force conclusions.

**“Ordinary people are clever and sharp.

I alone am clumsy and slow,drifting like the sea,blowing about, seemingly with no destination.”**

Cleverness is prized:speed, efficiency, strategy, advantage.

Laozi presents the sageas slow, clumsy, drifting—not driven by ego’s need to arrive somewhere impressive.

“Drifting like the sea”captures the Taoist rhythm:vast, open, responsive,not rigidly controlled.

“Blowing about” doesn’t mean chaos;it means being moved by the Tao,not by social pressure.

**“The people all have their purposes.

I alone am stubborn and strange.”**

Everyone has a plan, a mission, a brand.The world is full of “purpose.”

The sage seems strangeprecisely because he doesn’t livefrom ego-based purpose.

He is “stubborn”in refusing to abandon the Taoto chase socially approved goals.

“I am nourished by the Mother.”

Here he reveals the secret:

He may look foolish and empty,but he is fed from the deepest Source.

“The Mother” is the Tao as origin, womb, ground.

Being nourished by the Mothermeans he draws his life-force, peace, and directionfrom something beyond social approval—from the living mystery itself.

This is the hidden root of the sage’s way.

4. IFS-Informed Understanding — The Tao Inside the Psyche

This chapter maps beautifullyonto the experience of living from Selfin a parts-driven, performance-oriented world.

A. “Give up learning” → unburdening the Over-Intellectual Manager

Many systems have a manager part that believes:

• “If I just learn more, I’ll be safe.”

• “If I understand everything, I’ll never be hurt again.”

This part devours books, courses, theories, and concepts.It’s brilliant—but often exhausted and terrified underneath.

Laozi’s “give up learning”sounds like an invitation for this part to soften:

“You don’t have to carry this alone.You don’t have to solve everything with your mind.”

When this manager trusts Self,troubles ease.

B. “Yes/no, good/evil” → parts’ rigid polarity vs. Self’s spacious seeing

Protectors often think in sharp binaries:

• “This is safe / this is dangerous.”

• “I’m good / I’m terrible.”

• “They are right / they are wrong.”

These categories keep exiles containedand the world predictable.

Self, like the Tao,recognizes nuance:hurt and care can coexist,strength and vulnerability can blend,no part is purely “good” or “bad.”

Seeing this doesn’t erase boundaries—it just loosens rigid polarity.

C. The lonely sage → Self vs. the internal crowd

Inside, there are many “ordinary people”:

• The Performer who wants applause

• The Achiever who wants goals

• The Pleaser who wants harmony

• The Critic who wants control

When Self is leading,these parts may see Self as “foolish”:

• “You’re too slow.”

• “You’re not trying hard enough.”

• “You’re not defending us properly.”

Self can feel, in the beginning,like the quiet, odd one out—peaceful but outnumbered.

Yet Self is the only one“nourished by the Mother”—sourced from something deeper than fear or strategy.

D. “Like a baby” → Self’s innocence and non-performance

Self has a quality of innocence—not naive,but unperformed.

When Self is present with parts,it feels like:

• “I don’t have to impress anyone here.”

• “I don’t have to be the clever one.”

• “I can just be.”

This is the baby that has not yet smiled for an audience—existence before performance.

E. “Lost everything” → what protectors fear about unburdening

When parts start to unburden,they may feel like they’re losing:

• their roles

• their sharpness

• their control

To them, Self-led living can look like“having lost everything.”

But slowly, they discoverthat what’s actually being lostis tension, fear, and constant pressure.

In their place arises:

• ease

• authenticity

• a deeper kind of safety

F. “Nourished by the Mother” → Self’s connection to something larger

In IFS terms,Self feels mysteriously connected—

to life,to others,to something beyond the system’s old survival strategies.

Whether you name it Tao, Spirit, God, Source, or simply Life,the felt sense is the same:

“I am not running this alone.There is a deeper current moving with me.”

This is the nourishment Laozi speaks of.

5. A Soft Invitation — Not Therapy, Just Curiosity

• Which parts of me believe that more learning will finally make me safe?• Where inside do I cling to sharp yes/no, good/evil judgments to feel secure?• Are there parts that feel like the “ordinary people”—busy, purposeful, clever—while another presence in me feels strangely quiet and simple?• How does it feel to imagine an inner “fool” who is actually wise—slow, gentle, unhurried, not trying to prove anything?• Can I sense any place in me that feels “nourished by the Mother”—by something deeper than approval, plans, or performance?

6. Closing — The Tao and IFS Share the Same Gate

This chapter reveals a tender, vulnerable truth:

To live from the deepest part of youmay make you look foolishto the parts that worship speed, cleverness, and certainty.

But the sage, like Self,is willing to be misunderstoodin order to stay true to the center.

The world chases sharpness.Self abides in spaciousness.

The world multiplies opinions.Self rests in quiet seeing.

The world demands a clear purpose.Self moves from a deeper current—nourished by the same nameless MotherLaozi loved.

To walk this wayis to accept feeling “strange”and “out of step,”yet secretly rootedin a Source that never runs dry.

This is the Tao within.This is Self.